Today, was an up and down type of day. I get to Edmonson and I got a chance to talk to the sub who was filling in for my teacher. Wow this sub was a cutie, plus it helped that she just graduated from OU, so she knows what I am going through in the program. I pretty much got to run the class while she chipped in when I needed some help. I really like it at this school because a lot of the staff has really taking the initiative to get to know me. I decided to eat lunch with my kids today and I was surprised that no guys despite wanting me to eat with them did not sit with me :( My table consisted of all the girls from the 4th grade.

I went to my Japan class and finally we all got our exams back. I kept rubbing my eyes because I only saw 2 pink marks on my Scantron. I was so excited because I finally beat Sarah in an exam because she always rocked me in ECON last semester. I was so ecstatic that I thought I had the highest score in the class with a solid 4.0 on the first exam. However, to my dismay, this girl in front of me scored a 4.0 too. So I broke it into percentages, I got a 98% and she got a 103%. This will only motivate me to be the best in the class. On the bright side, Beth gave me a nice finger gesture because of my grade compared to her's. I'm at a crossroad in this class now that my grade has separated from the rest of the class. Do I continue to try to get the top GPA or do I hit cruise control to help my crew out in terms of Beth, Alisha, and Sarah? I don't like leaving peeps behind, so I know what I gotta do.

Finally today was the last game of the season for co-ed Troy leagues. Boy, was this a season I just want to forget. I have never lost this many games in a season. I isolated myself from the rest of the team tonight during the game. I figured if I joined them in the huddle then I would just say something discouraging. I talked to some of them and told them that I was offended in how next week they wanna go to the bar and watch the video's of our games. To me, that is something that should of been done during the season not after the season. Rob had to remind me that we are playing for fun. However, again whether this team is in first of last, I expect everyone to play with 100% heart and desire. I see people not even focused nor mentally prepared to play. I mean is it wrong of me to have that expectation? I mean I expect each game as if we are going to war as a team against another team. It's like I need all the troops to be prepared for battle. I guess this just leaves more discussion with God tonight.

Taking Over Me

Last night's Super Bowl game was one of the best I've seen. It ranks up there with the Rams vs. Titans and the Bills vs. Cowboys. The commercials sucked, I didn't care nor did I see about the whole Janet thingy. Which leaves to today, I finally got my new computer in. It's nice to be able to get back on the internet. However, I am sad because I miss my old computer. We had a lot of memories together and I'll never forget the first day we got it.

I've been debating where I wanna set this thing up. It is currently set up on my dinner table because it is not like I use it nor anyone comes over anyway. I like it this way because when I set it up last summer with my sis's computer it is in the same situation. I like it because I'm right behind the patio door and I like to go out and look at the stars, even as we speak right now.

My Aunt Lisa had a huge b-day party at her place today. Man I need to teach myself the Korean she taught me back in the day. It was nice cause my baby cuz was there along with Fred, Victor, Sonny, and Andrew. Screw the kiddy table, we had a whole kiddy room to ourselves. I took some rare pictures of them because 20 years from now this is the next generation of the family. Wendy and I took one together because we are an original 4 raised by our grandparents. However, I left the party early because of v-ball.

I've been listening to a lot of Evanescence again, I really love this cd. I noticed that I've been taking a step back and just viewing things. I'm trying not to say much and observe. I guess I've just had a lot of thoughts. I've been thinking about going on a road trip on my own very soon. Destinations include Toronto, Lexington KY, Columbus Ohio, or New York City. I just kinda wanna disappear for a little bit. I've been hearing and seeing things that just been irritating me. I spent a great deal of time in prayer last night too. Even then, afterwards I was discouraged as I continue to do my QT readings. I keep wondering what God wants me to do. I know and remind myself that His grace and peace is there. Bali's message a few years back keeps making me think about the whole Christian love aspect and what it truly is. Can't even sleep right now despite a big exam of Astro where I got Sonya, Erica, and Blythe all asking me questions. In addition, student teaching where my teacher is gone so I get a good part of the class on my own tomorrow. I guess I'll do my QT's, it's just hard when every question You ask Him, leads to more questions.

My Last Breath

Lately, I've been feeling drained and worn out. Physically, since Saturday it's been b-ball tournament, Sunday was 2 soccer games, and Monday & Tuesday were both v-ball game nights. Again physically, it just has taking it's toll on me. The tendonitis in my knees are killing me, my shoulder seems as it weighs a ton, and that blister on my shoulder just split wide open on Tuesday night at Beech Woods. Despite all that though, I had to deal with 5 days of school, and student teaching. In addition, there is 5:14 Fellowship along with worship at CBC. Many of my peeps at OU been wondering how do I hold up and still be on top of the game in class. I've shared with some of them that it's all God, and it helps for me to have that attitude of what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. I look at next week's schedule for school and I see that I am studying with Sonya on Monday, studying with Carl on Tuesday, 4 papers due, an Astro project, and 2 exams all for this upcoming week.

At school, I just kind of go on my own happy way. I mean in EED 354 and 420, all the old folks think I am annoying and obnoxous (sp?) while everyone my age believe that I am the funny one but also the leader of the classroom. In Japan, Alisha and Beth joined with Sarah and I now to run it up in class. Astro's been fun because I see Sonya 4 times a week but Alisha and Beth are in there too with me. Then there is Blythe in my Astro class, we studied together last night. I met her mom, and she is by far one of the most funniest parents I've ever met. She shared with me a story about Blythe which had to do with me. She was telling me how Blythe was happy that she made a friend at OU that she liked and was comfortable talking to. I just thank God that I could make an impact on someone's life at school because often times I just goof off in class. What was funny at tonight's class was Blythe could not partner up with Sonya and I. She had to partner up with this other dude across the lecture hall from me. So during lecture and lab, we called and talked to each other on the phone during class. However I did not like the number 1 finger she gave me when I kept looking at her. It's all good though we got much love for each other, however she went to the Poop school! It's funny because she can not remember this one person whom I have probs with at CBC because this person thinks he's all hard and all that. In reality this person is just a joke to me, but then again where's my love for this person. Yes this is something I struggle with everytime I have to see this person. At times, it has come down to me just decking this person because someone needs to humble his punk____! I'm glad Daddy Moy gave me some advice and Blythe just cracks me up when I looked through the Poop School yearbooks.

What else that's been bugging me lately too, is my image or rep at school sometimes. It's frustrating that all the prof's I have this semester know who I am after the first day of class. It's like I always get called on to answer some question that is like trying to figure out how to cure HIV. That is how the prof's here do attendance so this means I will not be skipping any classes this semester. On the bright side though, I did buy my computer yesterday for $1200. I can't wait till that gets to my crib and I can finally connect to the rest of the world.

After 3 weeks of student teaching, I love my kids at Edmonson Elementary School. I love Kayla, because she seems to really care about me and she is so cute, and small for a 4th grader. I love Monica with her little rabbit teeth, but yet she is also the brain in the class. I love both Lauren's because they are so helpful when I am teaching. Thomas reminds me of Frodo with his eyes. Ahhhh so many cutie kids in my classroom that I'm gonna take pics of them next week when I am there for a while since my teacher has jury duty. However, none of those kids beat out Boo Boo, as I took her to school this week she is the cutest 2nd grader out there at Wattles Elementary. Uh oh ED building is closing, Go Pats!

Grace and Peace to my peeps!

What a disappointment it was to only come in 3rd place this year at the CSC tournament. Yeah I'm trying to stay positive because we did better than last year's unexpected early round knockout. However, it pisses me off when people say well it was fun. I mean what fun was there, fun is not taking 3rd place. Fun is winning first and holding up $200 bones! Bobby and I rode back down together discussing the game. We wanted to get back asap so we can watch our game tapes to see what went wrong in our Final Four game, the conference finals. Again, this lost I feel is a reflection of how I played because of 2 things. First is that I am the PG, which means I run the offense. I felt I did not do a good job at the end quaterbacking the post plays. 2nd thing is though it would be nice if everyone knew their dang role on this team. I mean it's hard to pass it downlow when 3 people are all posting up next to each other. Again it's on me because I should of known better to tell 2 people to get out of the way. I never knew my unselfishness could cost us the game as well. Because someone kept nagging me if they could sub for me. It was 10-10 so I let this person sub for me because they felt as if I needed a break. However, it's like Mama Iverson said about her son at the time which goes for me, "Man the kid is 23 years old, he don't need know rest." 3 possessions later after that sub, yeah I was back in because the game had now been 12-10 and the bench was pissed that this person even subbed for me. Yeah we lost from that point on, why because I sat out and this person can't play defense. Which brings me to my next point, I personally felt that their were some people who were dogging it on defense. I mean this team was smaller than us and some people did not know how to get through a back screen. That just baffles me, and if you tired then sit down. I have no probs telling it to some of my teammates right now that I felt they were dogging it on D.

I wanted the chance to play against Baron Davis's team because that guy was good. Bobby said it best when someone asked us during dinner time if we were afraid of those 2 American dunking teams. "We aint scared of anybody on the court." Seriously though, people need to know their roles and some need to stop hot dogging it out there.

It was nice to spend time with Daddy Moy and the family last night. I'm glad God has blessed me with a godly man with whom I can seek for spiritual wisdom. It just gets tough when it seems like you are out there serving and it looks as if you are serving alone. I just needed to be reminded again that I can't be discouraged by those around me and to keep the hope and faith. Anyhootie, I guess I better get started on my school work now.

Be

So you think you're untouchable?
Word life
This is basic thuganomics
I'm untouchable but I'm forcing you to feel me

So right now I'm chilling in Stixie's room while listening to the ladies singing it up on K Revolution. I just found out that one of my aunt's has passed away out in SF. So it's been kind of hard trying to focus on the tournament while thinking about the funeral preparations. My dad's gonna fly out on Sunday night for the funeral and come back early Tuesday morning. I've been searching like mad crazy trying to find a cheaper flight so I can go. But to no avail because that was the only way that I could is if I found a cheaper flight than my dad did. If I only I knew how to do instant transmission.

Anyhow, it's almost game time!

Blow It Out