What the GG! I just can't sleep so I was putting down all the thoughts that were running through my mind and then bam dumb AOL kicks me off. Gosh I hate it when that happens, I might as of well played Dynasty Warriors 4 if I knew this would happen. Oh well, Dynasty Warriors 4 won't solve anything so here we go again with just some random thoughts that have plagued my mind for tonight:

First, I keep thinking about Connie's last entry, judgement. That is one of my weaknesses that go hand in hand with expectations. I often look at others before I even look at myself, which is a no no.

Second, I wonder who will be the ultimate Survivor? I hope it is Jenna, all she needs to do is win the next 2 immunity awards and she has it. Go Jenna!

Third, gosh I hope that dream I had a couple of nights ago is not true or will not come true. But the saying is dreams do come true, so if it does, please God help me brace it.

Hmmm I wonder what should be my tournament song for May 25th? I'm leaning towards any of these selections, All The Things She Said (t.a.T.u.), Lose Yourself (Eminem), or Die Another Day (Madonna). Right now my fav is Die Another Day just because I would of felt like I would die if my knee wouldn't hold up to get me through the tournament. Any suggestions?

5th, is I keep looking at one of my cd's, Trust Company. The album name is called The Lonely Position of Neutral, how true is that do I feel. Yup it sucks I tell ya, I mean people say things change for the better, but is that really true? Things are a changing, and all I can do is continue to try and keep that hope, faith, and love that things will be for the better. I know I need God more than ever right now just to seek His guidance and His direction through all this.

The last thing is how often do we take our faith, salvation, etc. for granted? How often do I do it? Why do I keep thinking about that dream or let alone petty things? What I should be focusing on is my own spiritual growth or as Chrissy would put it in her recent entries, how can I be a light of the world? Yes, I can hear God calling on me, to serve the 5:14 Fellowship and to take it to another level, because we're getting there.

You Spin Me Around