Ok today had to be one of the most annoyingest days of my life. So I just ask all y'all who read this to forgive my language, because I'm just gonna bitch about my day.

So I wake up, this morning, thinking yeah I'm gonna get to work even earlier today because of GM shutdown and people just leaving for vacation so less people on the freeway to work. However, I'm flying down Van Dyke to only find that one lane has been shut down which clogged up traffic from 18 mile to 16 mile. So of course thank goodness it was in the Heights, so I decided to fly down the subdivisions because I know those like the back of my hand. Eventually I flew back on to Van Dyke to get onto 696 thinking yeah get to work early and play Pokemon with my kids. As soon as I got onto 75, I read about some sort of contruction from 7 mile to Davison. I noticed traffic hadn't move for like the longest time, so I decided to take 8 mile and go down Woodward. With this little detour, it took me a little over an hour to get to work today. Oh and I didn't get to work early either, but just on time.

I get to work, to train 2 new peeps, Natalie and Yaya. I gave Yaya the benefit of the doubt, that maybe I was just paranoid the other day of her death stare. So I talked to her and yeah forget the death stare, she just gave me the "your stupid look." So she kept talking crap to me like I'm retarded or something. Which lead me to finally decide to tell my kids to go attack her. So we played my version of Pokemon, and like lightning, the kids jumped on her, and kicked her. Until Cindy got hurt, so I called all of them back, but it was fun to me because Yaya gave me that "steam coming out of her ears look." I apologized to Cindy for her getting hurt but she sucked it up and gave me a hug and continue to be my Ditto.

Then I announced to my Day Camp that this week will be Pokemon week, in which we will watch Pokemon 1-4 starting with 1 today. So Yaya kept showing me how she knows her Pokemon. That is until I stumped her and was just like yeah you don't know your stuff. Man I tell ya that death stare she has is like an Cyclop's optic blast.

I finally decided to leave work today at 5:30 because I was the only one left other than Tracy and Matt. I'm thinking yeah I can go to Best Buy and FCS to purchase some things for the Retreat. Hop on to 75, then hop back off due to the non-moving traffic. So I'm thinking yeah I'll be smart and take 94. Yup, 94 was even worst then 75, so I flew down the shoulder of 94 to quickly exit and ride the service drive. I quickly swung a hard left to decide to take Van Dyke from 5 mile all the way back home. For the first 3 minutes, I was flying thinking man I should take this way home more often. Then bam a train comes on down, and yeah I was stuck in the same spot on Van Dyke for 20 minutes. The only good thing was that I had my Game Boy Color to play Pokemon to kill time.

Now as I am home, which took nearly 2 hours to get home, I have to leave again. Why? Because Best Buy by my house did not have what I was looking for, so I have to go down to the Oakland one to get it in order for me to get reimburst this week, otherwise I'll have to wait a month. Then I get to go out to eat with my folks, so yeah I love how my house is just a sleeping place for me.

The only good thing that happened to me today was finally seeing my Pikachu back in camp. I love Sophia and yes I have to hold my tears in this year. So with all this crazy crap going on today, I have now decided what I will be doing for July 4th. I will be heading out to NYC on my own, I believe I just need to get away from here, from the people, and things in general, while my folks go to Toronto. Gotta represent the D in the NYC under the big lights baby.

Heaven

I just got home not to long ago from seeing baby Josiah. Seeing him in his little crib hooked up to a few machines made me think about some of my own things. I kept wondering how did I come out as a baby? I kept wondering if I was very demanding as a baby? Seeing Josiah, so small and fragile made me think of just life in general.

Today was also finally the last of my CBC Retreat Video. I looked around the whole sanctuary to see just how much CBC has grown in numbers. However, then I thought about it, yeah it's great we have more people at CBC. But, how come it is still the same people serving at CBC? I kept wondering if we are trully growing as a church spiritually. I use this quote that was best describe for us at CBC and maybe it is quite accurate "A lot of people are takers and not givers." I keep wondering if that is really true.

Here's a convo from last year I had with my mommy about. I was watching her video from when my parents went to HK the year before.

K: My mommy, who's that cute girl eating with you for dim sum.
M: That girl is your cousin.
K: Oooooh that's sick man, I think I'm gonna puke now!

Dang it, I need to know my family tree better, next time before I speak. Now it's time to get some rest for worky work and be The Children's Champion. Oh one last thing, wooo did I just get the cold shoulder today or what? Which reminds me of another thing, are people like ignorant of things that go around them, or don't care, or just plain dumb?

No No No

You are Romans.


Which book of the Bible are you?
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Today was the first time that I worked, but not at the restaurant, at ACA. It felt wierd because I kept thinking the whole time that it was Thursday today. All in all, work went pretty well today, didn't have that staff meeting as anticipated. I noticed today though Tracy did challenge me even more by leaving me in charge of more things while she stepped out. I laid the law down with my kids and for the most part they did a good job.

For the past 2 summers, I always had the kids play this game that I made up. It's actually pretty affective too, I call it Pokemon. It's where I am the trainer and the kids are my Pokemon and the other counselors are Team Rocket. This year, I told myself that I will not play that game because my kids literally beat down some of the counselors last year. However, today things changed and it was due to Tonda and Stephanie calling themselves the famous "Tickle Monsters", which lead a rebellion by all the kids to attack them. They were looking for a leader and they all came to me looking for orders on how to take down the Tickle Monsters. Well, all the kids literally tackled both of them down, Tonda was pinned down with one kid doing some sort of sumo splash on her, while Stephy was brought down to her butt. Here's the convo's of the day:

S: Go get Kenny!
Emily and Jenny: No, he's our trainer!
S: He's brainwashing you.
E and J: No you are because you're evil.
K: Hahahahah
S: Go attack him!
E: No, he's my owner.
K: Hahahah
Michael: Can I skull bash both of them now?

Boy it's so hard not to play Pokemon now. Today was also a day of stinky, with one kid doing a # 2 but missed the toilet. Shen-Lin made me check David's butt by literally pulling his shorts away from his butt to look for poop stains. Man that was nasty!

I also had to take care of my Ling Ling, gosh she is so adorable, yet her hormones have started a little too early. She was crying to me today because Tracy confiscated her Game Boy. It's been wierd this week already with those who cry, they always come to me to take care of them. It's too bad Ling Ling ain't signed up for next week. She is a lot smarter than I thought when it came down to battling our Pokemon today.

Man, gambling is such a bad way of self-control, well maybe just for me. I kept thinking, well if I lose, I know I will want to play more to win it back. Then again, if I kept winning, which was the case today, I will want to play more. So it's like in a mindset, it's a no win situation, although it was fun to come out $60 richer today. It makes up for my $65 dive I had over Christmas break.

Finally I got to see a Tigers game at Comerica Park! I'm thankful to God for just blessing me with such a wonderful boss who gives me free stuff. Boy, this game had more fans than what I see on TV too. It was nice to watch fireworks too afterwards. All in all, it was a nice experience and had great seats to enjoy the game with wonderful friends as well.

Young Gun

The last 24 hours have been kind of crappy, their were few things that made the day brighter. However, all in all it was a very humbling experience today. First let's start off with last night, with yet another discussion of the fate of the CBC Pistons. I remember when people all agreed upon that this CCUC tournament was a outreach first ministry. You would think a team with all believers can be a light on the court. Or possibly a team with majority believers does not necessarily mean we are all strong in our faith but yet lift one another up. You think would think that tournament which says on their form as the theme says "promoting an atmosphere of fellowship and friendship among Christian athletes and fans" that our fellowship team would be ok to go into Chi-town. Or even as representatives as CBC, you think it this team would be able to enter the tournament without a shadow of a doubt, because we have majority CBC people.

However, that is not the case unfortunately. People seem to only look at the talent, in terms of "oh that is too strong for a C team." We've had teams in the past that were similar to this, and it's like hmm that saying don't mean a thing without that ring. Well if C is so easy then where oh where are the championships? Because of all this drama and politics, it lead me to one point to do 2 things. First was, I just wanted to hand in all my CCUC letters and just quit, not bothering helping out anymore. Secondly, this also crossed my mind as well, I just don't even want to go anymore. This whole event was suppose to be a fun event for everyone all the way from Friday to Sunday. However, it has lead to some of us to stumble in our faith. I mean do people even realize the end result of their meddling. I keep asking myself just how do some teams pass, while ours fail.

Which pretty much leads to this team's fate. We will play B, not because we WANT to, but because we HAVE to, in order for us to stay together as a body of guys who have a special bond with one another that all of us would do anything to stay together. After a day of cooling off my temper, if this is our fate, then I'm ready to push myself to play hard, and to try and keep the faith.

Which leads to today, I walked into ACA way early for work. I came in early because all my kids who do come early wanted to battle me in a Pokemon battle. I walked in, and Viotta told me to go into the computer room. I thought it was a trick, and Viotta kept questiong my disobedience to her. The whole time I kept wondering what was up, then it turned out to be a surprise. The surprises came walking out, and it was Crystal and Henry! I was so excited to see them back for this field trip and to only find out that they will be going to all our field trips.

However, again that seemed to be the best news of the day. We went to go strawberry picking in A2 Jr. Today I noticed again, just how relax some of us were as counselors almost to the point that I would say, that we all got kind of lazy today. I even got yelled at by Tracy, but she saw the cause and not the effect part. As Day Camp came to a close, and all the kids were leaving. Tracy and I had a long talk about the responsibilities of us as counselors. Let me tell you, it was a very humbling talk, because maybe I haven't been as good as a counselor as I thought this year. A lot of my weaknesses were pointed out as well along with other counselors that she pointed out. Tracy gave me the heads up, that tomorrow their will be a staff meeting, so that every counselor can be re-evaluated.

Tracy kept talking about how last year went so well. The credit was given to Elaine, which she did do a great job, as well as that we both worked/discussed things outside of ACA. I told Tracy how hard it is this year, due to the fact that we have a lot of people who come in and just clock out as soon as 3 or 4 shows up on the clock. After some time of just reflecting and evaluating my ownself, it's easy to say, but I need to step it up a notch then. Last year, I could coast through things because I had Elaine to cover me, vice versa. This year, I'm left alone to really do majority of the work and I can't rely on anyone. I need to work on my weaknesses because I don't like to even think of the thought that I failed as a counselor to these kids. It sucks that I'll have to sit in that staff meeting just to listen again, at what I feel is what a crappy job I've done. However, may I use it to also challenge me to do my best.

When Love and Hate Collide

Tonight I went grocery shopping and I took a stroll down the toy isle just to check out what's been out lately. I came across something that is soooo old school and boy these things rocked. Does anyone remember M.U.S.C.L.E. at least that is what I think they were called? Does anyone remember these little guys that you can wrestle with a little ring and go one on one? Gosh I used to love playing these things back in the day when I spent my dayz in Roseville. I'd play with my cousin Damon, and his friends the Chan brotha's Jimmy, and Ray Ray. Those were the days, but do I stand correct with the name?

Already 2 days into work, and I have noticed some thing different this year. Is it just me or is it that all the counselors are just not into it or something? I remember last year, Elaine and I would talk about things that we thought could better the camp for our kids. Yesterday, as soon as Ayinde walked in, he just grabbed 2 cups of coffee and loaded it with sugar, and today he just had his head down at certain points of the camp. Then I look to my right to see Tonda, just sitting there and not doing much other than chatting with a couple of kids. I see Steph, and she looked like she was in cruise control, but I will give her the benefit of the doubt since this is her first day and I am responsibile for training her.

So I sit back and think just how much I need to be more transparent with my own energy to show the kids that hey I'm interested in doing this and that they can feel excited about this. It's just how much can I give, when all I need to rely on is God constantly.

I was also excited to seeing Jaime and Jessie and it brought a bigger smile to my face as I found that they will be going to our field trip this Thursday. What's cool is also that I have designated them into my group as well.

What was funny or cool or something, was how Angela today grabbed her chinese book. She decided to read me a short story in mandarin then translating it into english. This is all hoping that I can expand my mandarin skillz.

Finally some quotes of the day:
(I was collecting the kids books in the classroom)
K: Hey Tracy (one of my coordinators), this is a good book for you.
T: What's that?
K: How I Made A Friend.
T: (hits me in the leg) You shut up!
A: Hahahahaha

(In the middle of 7-Up)
Andrew: Let's take a piss break!
Phillip: Yeah I need to go do a number 1!
K: Hahahaha
A and T: Who said you can say that type of stuff?

Finally, thanks V for thinking about me when you said that stuff. I totally believe what you said is true as well.

All For Love

I walked into work today with mixed emotions. I was the first counselor there and I saw the names on the table so I got first dibs on which one I want. However, I was bummed because I didn't see names that I wanted to see on it. Then my disappointment quickly changed as Emily came up to hug me right away. As we all had to introduce ourselves to all the kids, the chants of my name began lead by Phillip and Anna. I felt as if I am The Children's Champion once again.

I have Shuang still who I still have yet to figure out why she picks me as her favorite counselor. I give her these least amount of attention but yet she always clings to my arm. This year, she wants to be called by her english name, Sarah. But she said it was ok for me to call her my little Shuang Shuang still.

Then I look across the room and see Michael with his little brother, David. It's funny seeing Michael back because he was one of my many Pokemon last year. Whenever I said skull bash attack, he would just propel himself head first into one of the other counselor's stomach.

I am also building some friendships with Ling and Angela, or actually Ling said I can call her Ling Ling. I'm so excited also to see Jessie and Jaime tomorrow because their mom is teaching the class a science project. Gosh I miss those two so much, and I still remember when their parents invited me over to get to know one another better. Then I found out that Cathryn and her sister are coming with us this Thursday to go strawberry picking! They are the only peeps who talk back to me, and it's in cantonese, but it's all good.

At first I was also kind of bummed when my hours got cut short. Then I thought about it, and see how I am still getting more hours than anyone else at this point. I've also been favored a lot in my opinion because my coordinator has given me 2 free prime rib dinners at some steak house in the D, and now she is offering me 20 free tickets to the Tigers game this Friday! I told her to offer it to the kids first and if none are taken, any 5:14 peeps wanna go?

I know a lot of us complain about our jobs and what not. But honestly I must be wierd or something but I love my job. I love my job so much, that even on those days where I am scheduled to get a day off, I have decided to still work despite not getting paid. Like I said before it's never been about the money to me. I love going in on Monday's being the first one in and by Friday knowing that I am gonna be the last to leave. I love how everyone has labeled Sophia as my Sophia that she will be coming soon too. I love that everyone can joke about my tears that I wept from last summer when she left camp. I love my job so much that I don't even call it a job anymore but a ministry to me that God has blessed me with.

Time to call it a night and get ready for another day of happiness and joy!

Dirrty

So tonight's entry is all about relying on God's strength. Yesterday, I got to meet my staff for this summer at ACA, and I know my hours as well. When I first met my staff, I was kind of down because I missed working with Elaine. Also one girl who scares the crap out of me is Yaya. Dude she gives the evil glare at me harder than anyone else. I'm just like uhhh can't you take a jokey joke? Then it just seems like Tonda and Allen have brought their whole crew to work with ACA this year. I'm glad that I still have my boy, Ayinde. I'm glad to meet and get to know Stephanie, and Stefanie as well. I just feel like an outsider with this year's staff, but then I saw Jennifer, Connie, Wei, and Michael which helped me get through with what I was feeling.

Then I was kind of bummed over my hours as well. Now this might sound strange, but I want more hours. My boss thinks that I will need some time to rest, but I believe I can handle it all. The question is, can I remain to be The Children's Champion this summer once again?

Praise the Lord for Josiah, but I'd still prefer Bubba. I was sitting in service after finished running around, and I kept wondering how much longer can I keep this up? The verse that kept running through my mind is from 1 Cor. 9:25 or is it 1:25? I just need to continue to rely on God's strength to be able to serve Him otherwise I will simply burnout. With Bubba Sr. out of the pic for the retreat, and another brother who does not even attend the meetings, the promo team is no more and has now been a one man show. I just kept asking God today to continue to give me the strength to finish out this ministry up till the retreat.

Then came the meeting, and now God has given me another ministry to lead, which is coming up with the Retreat Activity. When it was decided that I would be heading this up, I just looked towards the sky, asking God to just give me the energy to do His Will.

Then their's the children's program which I am partially responsible for as well. Getting together with the OCC peeps to discuss their responsibilities is taking my only free night away which is Monday. Every night is packed with something, v-ball, fellowship, retreat activity, and evangelism training possible. I keep praying now that with all this going on, that none of it will take away my own individual time with God.

I was sitting for the past of Chinese service as well, and not understanding a lick what Brother Bian was preaching. I kept looking around and for the first time in maybe a long time, I missed something. What I was missing or wishing maybe, is for my parents own salvation. I kept imagining my parents sitting there in the chinese congregation, and listening to the message then see me serve God through skits. Yeah, everything we do is for God or should be, but I just wish my parents could see me at CBC serving God and to see how much I love God. I know it's all in God's timing as well on how he would use me to be a witness to them. All I can do is remain patient and seek Him for His strength.

I miss the kids that I grew a close bond with last summer such as Crystal, Jimmy, Nancy, Jessie, Jamie, Ao Xue. Now I look towards this summer with a new set of kids, and more new challenges. I keep listening to the song "Clocks" just for the tune, and I see myself in a tunnel. In this tunnel, I'm wearing one of those boxer's robes, getting ready for a fight. This tunnel is filled with darkness with only the light shining at me. I feel as if, I've pushed myself to be stronger physically, mentally, and spiritually to overcome the hurdles that I have been layed before me. However, the strength that I have gained, does not compare to God's strength. I need to continue to seek it.

Escape

Today, I went to VBS for the first time this year. Again it just feels wierd not serving in this ministry for the first time. The reception I got was like to me, unbelievable from the children. I had kids, ask me to come back, or just shouting my name, or high fives all over the place, or just a giggle and a laugh. I remember my first year serving VBS, I had no idea what I was doing due to the fact that I was a new Christian at the time. Dan and Cindy paired me up to assist Anna with the 1st and 2nd graders. I learned so much from Anna, and it's still a shame that I never go to say good-bye to her and their family as God called them to serve elsewhere. Anna let me do all the games with them and help them with their Bible memory verses, which in turn helped me grow as well. Dan asked me to lead the opening programs or be the MC. Gosh that was hard, but I learned how to try to relate things in a Biblical fashion. I remember that year I related everything to Pokemon. After that year, I continued to serve VBS, to carry out what I learned from Dan, Cindy, and Anna.

My 2nd year at VBS, I was in charge of Field Day which was really tough because I had never done that. Last year, I was leading all of VBS with Charlene. This year, it is just amazing how much VBS has grown. My first year at VBS, we used to average the numbers of 66 kids. Each year it has steadily grown, and this year's numbers well at least today, we had 97 kids! Praise the Lord for all this, gosh I just wished I could be more involved, I can't stand being a spectator. What else was a true blessing was that 3 of my ACA kids attended VBS for the first time this year.

Tonight, I was invited over to BBQ with the Ng's. I love it when I can just walk across the street, and save some miles. Little did I know, it was like a huge gathering, of all the Eastside Joshua Family Fellowship. It was a lot of fun, because I didn't hang out with Ray and his crew nor Steven's crew. Instead I formed my own or should I say they followed me because they wer afraid of both of their crews. It was fun hanging out with Kit Kat, and my Yu 2 girls. It made think of how I missed not even seeing Emily and Elizabeth at VBS this year. It made me feel happiness or joy, however you wanna look at it, when I was in the backyard helping with the cooking, and then I see Elizabeth through the window, and she just kept waving and smiling and looked happy to see me.

I was talking to Emily and I admire her fearlessness about her upcoming surgery. I promised her that I would come visit her on the day of her surgery before/after. It means probably waking up a lot earlier and staying down in Detroit a lot later, but eh I care about her and Elizabeth, it's called sacrifice, and the love for one another. Just the look in Emily's eyes made her feel happy that I was gonna be there with her. Elizabeth was equally as happy because she was afraid if she couldn't go into the surgery room with her mom, so now she has someone to watch out for her. I will also continue or start that is praying for Emily.

For those, who never liked or hated my voicemail. I have now changed it today, using my favorite 5th grader, Elizabeth's voice to be on it now. So what did I experience today? Happiness or joy? Whatever it was, it made me feel just stronger and that I can do anything as long as I have God. Also I read an interesting verse today as well, it's from Proverbs 20:1. If any of you get a chance, take a look at it. It made me think about people I know who use this to give them some sort of happiness or joy or it just makes them feel cool.

Nothin's Gonna Stand In Our Way

Sometimes when your hopes have all been shattered
And there's no where to turn
You wonder how you keep going
Think of all the things that really mattered.
And the chances you've earned
The fire in my heart is still burning
You can fly, if you try leaving the past behind
Heaven only knows what you find
Dare to believe you can survive
You hold the future in our hands
Dare to keep all my dreams alive
It's time to take a stand
And you can win, if you dare

Well today was the last day of IST, I was happy that there was no final. I'm really praying hard that I will end up with a 3.9 in this class, I won't settle for anything lower than a 3.5 in this class. Thank you to Ann, Nikole, and Erin for helping me throughout class. If it wasn't for these ladies I would of failed in this class due to playing too much euchre.

Now I have one more class, which is the big one on Friday. One more exam then finally no more classes till September. Now this class I need a miracle in to pass this class. Hopefully I can use my time wisely on Thursday.

Today I worked out at the Rec Center with JW. Boy was it fun to finally be able to do my daily routines and get stronger and quicker by the time the next tournament rolls around. I can't wait to go back tomorrow after VBS.

Dare

After some reflection time, I keep thinking where I am at spiritually since my quiet time has been down lately. Using the Transformers as my analogy, I feel like Hot Rod in the movie. It was when his ship crashed on the planet with all the Sharkticons. He was like in this ocean full of robot pirahnas, squids, and live tenticals all just grabbing at him, trying to eat him alive or pull him apart. He keeps calling out all his friends but no one can help him. Then he realizes that he must get out of this situation on his own. Gosh I missed the movie.

The fortunate one
To be fast, and free and young
I want to count myself among
The fortunate ones
We won't be denied
We know that time is on our side
We've got the passion and the pride
We won't be denied
This generation
With fire in our eyes
Strong are the ties that bind us
We don't need no alibis
Nothing's gonna stand in our way

I was at Peter's house last night and we were just chilling. Then Tony, Peter, and I began talking about Transformers. Then we busted out all the tunes on the computer. So it lead me to downloading all the Transformers music. Growing up, Damon and I always watched it together. His favorite is Starscream and Soundwave and mine is Hot Rod. I wish they brought the real cartoon back instead of this cheap imitation Transformers Armada. I have my reasons for Hot Rod as my fav, and since I'm in the mood, feel free to tell me who your favorite Transformers is and why?

It's nice to see somethings are going back to normal with some of my peeps. On the other hand it's funny how some things continue to change. As of now, I'm talking to someone who I considered a really close friend. Now though he's changed so much, and it's like I just want to ask him, why are you such a dick now? It frustrates me how I feel like I can trust people then it's like it just falls apart. These people and their continued BS, is just getting too silly. But like last week's Bible Study, through these trials, I must be overcome with joy to get past these hurdles.

Instruments of Destruction

It's been a rough, frustrating, and reflective time the last 48 hours now. The first playing at the CBC tournament, I got to know a few more faces. It was frustrating to see Ying go down in the first game with an injury. Yeah I wanted to play against her team when they were at full strength. But you just don't want to see any player go down with an injury. It was fun though to play against her team because I just want to keep testing my limits. I was told, that if we had another hitter on our team then we would of pulled out on top. For a while I believed that too, but now I still believe that with our team, we could of taken them. I haven't played against a team as skilled as Ying's team in a while. Even during our regular game, I kept trying to attack them in different ways, but man it was hard to find a weak point on their team, but I know that our team still has chance to win. Congrats to their team though, because they just played better than we did. Man that bring an army strategy has worked for them twice now. Just bring an army of players, go to the finals, and let the other team run out of gas.

After the tournament, it was on to Andy's bachelor party. It was just a true guys nite out type of thing. I mean we had steaks, potatoes, corn, king crab, video games, b-ball, videos, farting, burbing, all sorts of other gases, #2's, and the list just goes on. I'm blessed to be around such great friends, and a sense of brotherhood with each other.

After worship, I kept thinking about Kevin's message, well not about Fudge, but his message yesterday at the tournament. I was thinking just in fact how strong prayer is. Granted I feel like I've been slacking in that department lately. It got me thinking about some of my current struggles, what if I prayed or enhanced my prayer life even more, just to see what God will unfold in my life. God has truly blessed Kevin the gift of speaking and being knowledgable of God's Word.

It's frustrating to me, to be like yeah some of put in a great deal of time and effort to put together the video. Only to be critized for not incorporating more chinese into it. It's frustrating to me, that the reason why we didn't is because someone from that congregation signed up for chinese promo. It's frustrating to me, that I now have to babysit or "hold his hand" to help him with the chinese promo. It's frustrating to me, that he has not shown up to any of the retreat meetings. It's frustrating to me, that he is twice as old as I am, and can't even be responsible for at least trying to getting informed of what's going on as a whole.

What else is frustrating, is not being able to possibly be with your friends and play with them. It's frustrating that people only see the game part of it, and perhaps missing our overall picture, which is to build each other up in Christ and to be godly men. I keep thinking about Abraham's situation right now.

It's frustrating to come home and to find out that your basement window has been busted by the neighborhood kids. Although it was an accident, and I'm thankful for the parents to own up to it and is willing to pay for it. But of course, waiting for the window people to come and fix it, is like something I don't have time for.

It's sad that in less than 24 hours I will have to give up my old car. It sucks that I am running low on cash as well now. It's frustrating not being able to serve in this year's VBS. I'm sore, but yet it's kind of a good soreness, if their is such a thing. Tomorrow is a new day, and I guess it is time to start working out again now that the knee has healed (hopefully). I love going to the Rec Center, at times I feel so alone there, yet I can take out all my aggression through every single machine. The Rec Center is almost like my happy place, it's a place where I can just go and push myself to the limits, and not be bothered by distractions.

Last frustration, is to see the Spurs win the championship. Kudos to Tim Duncan though, I just love how he masters all the fundamentals of the game.

Instead

I dreamed I was going down to Puerto Rico
Now I'm feeling that I really gotta go
Cause I really want to get away and spend sometime with You
To get away cause my life is getting kinda crazy
The only way to make it is to pray
That's why I'm really gonna get away
And spend some time with You

Today, I probably had the most down time I've ever had for myself lately. I took yet another quiz today in BIO, and I kept telling myself that I need to boost my grade back up. Well that didn't happen today, because out of 7 questions on this last quiz. I scored a fat 0 correct, geee I might as well not shown up for the quiz.

I finally got done doing this CBC Retreat tape. I went to FCS today as well to just browse around. I ended up buying the new Stacie Orrico cd, because hey it came with another free cd. Anyways, this is a great cd, a lot of her songs made me think of my own walk and challenged me to think deeper about certain things. Also, I never realized that Stacie can bust out some rap tunes as well. She is soooo cute too! If any of y'all get a chance, buy her cd. I'm hoping that she comes back so I can go to her concert. I don't know but she could win my CCUC dedication this year, hmmm I wonder if P Nutz is staying with Kelly Clarkson?

Quote of the night, after my new haircut:
(I walk out of my bathroom)
Q (Screaming): Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Oooooooooohhhh (laughing) my gosh, I'm laughing so hard that I feel like I can have my kid now.
R: You look like a Japanese anime character.
Me: Cool!

Yup, I look freaky looking or even more to all y'all.

Ok my new goal now is to stay healthy for the next 48 hours so I can play in Bad Blood. I already asked for a request to those who are doing the scheduling. My request, is that Team Bring It plays against Ying's team right off the bat. I want a chance to play them when they are fresh, so we all are at 100% energy. Hopefully my request goes answered.

Tight

Dang it, I need to learn how to use this upgraded blogger now. Anyways that last entry was suppose to be yesterdays. What I learned today in BIO or what has been discussed this whole is something that I just totally zone out. The first topic was all about PMS, and boy a lot of women in the class were just voicing out their opinions and how men don't know what they go through. My first thought was hmmmm go blame Eve, then the whole lecture got more and more R rated so I just tuned out. Then the lecture moved on to sexual reproduction, so of course finally I got into this lecture. Then after 5 minutes, I decided to tune out because I had more fun doing that then listening. Then I saw my current grade in the class, and it dropped a whole have a point and I was like uhhhh man I gotta subject myself to listening more now.

I haven't gotten a chance to blog about this, which is the NBA Finals. I really hope this series plays out all 7 games, despite how much I don't like the Spurs. I really admire Kidd, Martin, and Jefferson. Of course my first unit of just watching/studying players are Francis, Kobe, T-Mac, and Iverson. Kidd though heads my 2nd group of guys that I love to watch. I always study his passes and I often wonder if I see the same things he sees on the court. I love how he dominates the game without even having to score 20 points or more. I love K-Mart because I just love his all out emotion, he is just pumped and ready to go every time he is out there, and he gets the crowd involved. I love Jefferson because he just soars above the rim to throw it down and he shows no fear attacking the rim.

Today, we had our b-ball meeting to discuss about our individual decisions. It really got me thinking how much I miss one of my closest friends in high school, Shiju. I met him my junior year at Stevenson, during gym class. My first thought was, this kid best get off my court then he ripped it right out of my hands and schooled me. I studied his moves, and then we played together, and we formed one of the most solid backcourts at Stevenson. Nobody wanted to go through our press we had. We both considered ourselves the top defenders at school. We both have great respect for each other.

With that respect from b-ball, it took our friendship off the court even stronger. We were strong friends, and teammates on and off the court. We had a unique bond with one another. We played ball 24-7, when we weren't playing pick-up at Dumars, Metro Hoops, B-ball City, Warrener Park, Stadler Park, Macomb Gardens Park, etc.... we would study each player's moves and discuss how we would go about defending that person. People thought of us as the dynamic duo, as I was compared to the Batman and he was the Robin. Which naturally fit because I was a year older and his personality is more of a quiet demeanor. I remember one time, he tried to share Christ with me, but I blew it off as I kept telling him that b-ball is what we need to focus on now.

It's kind of funny how things changed now. I haven't talked to Shiju for almost a year now, but he sees and tells me that he is thankful of how much I've changed. We went our separate ways once he graduated, as he was more into his relationship with his girl, while I continued to improve myself as a baller. I miss those times that he and I played on the court. I remember when we played in leagues together, we'd have a side challenge for each other. The challenge was to see who can lead the team in steals after each game, I loved that because it pushed me to play 100% every play to beat him. Then their were those times that we spent just hanging out with each other. Those times progressed into playing 1 on 1 against each other, to continue to better each other as a player. I miss my ol' pal Shiju, and I hope that God continues to look after him and his family. Man I miss those days on and off the court with him.

Good Guy

Whoa, a new way to blog, hopefully this piece of garbage doesn't delete entries like the other one. Today, I learned another annoying thing about being a homeowner. It is, called pest control, ever since last summer, I've been hearing noises in the morning all around the walls of my room. I always thought it was like raccoons or something up on the roof. However, I learned today that their have been birds building nests like crazy near these two holes in the corners of my house. So now that I have pest control to terminate these birds. The thing is that they are up in my attic too, probably destroying the interior of the house. So now I gotta shell out $200 so that people can come here and kill these suckers. I think it would of been cheaper and actually more fun, if I bought a new BB gun and shot each one. But of course my mom discouraged me for doing something like this.

Here's the quote of the night for me from Rich:
Rich: "Did you know that 2 Fast 2 Furious grossed at about $52 million?"
Me: Yeah, pretty amazing isn't it?
Rich: Yeah, I never realized that their were that many stupid people willing to see it.
Me: Dang it!

Speaking of stupid movies though, I'm not really picky about movies. But dang it, I gotta say now, after seeing Not Another Teen Movie just now, this movie is just awful. I gotta agree with Shubs, and say I would not want to see this movie if it was free.

Finally, it looks like things are taking shape with the CBC Tournament rolling around. Maybe I'm more of an optimistic person, but I'm kind of glad that their is only 5 teams so far. The teams are a lot stronger than they were last year already. Their has been some good ol' fashion trash talking as well, which makes things a lot more fun. It will be funny too if Howard has to bust out his card. I also learned tonight about what it takes to be a good host as well. It would be so great if just one, just one person I could talk and share Christ with. I'm hoping that will be in my mind throughout the day as I try to focus on playing as well. Of course this is a struggle for me.

One last blurp about what I will refer to now as Bad Blood. How cool would it be to repeat as champs well, at least P Nutz and I can say that. I still remember that year I first came to CBC and played with Charles, Achi, and JW. Howard told me that because of my knee, he picks Ying's team as the favorites to win. All I could do is smile, because I like being the underdog, and it just motivates me even more to play that much harder. The theme song for Bad Blood will be All That She Said by T.A.T.U. because I've been hearing too much of that he said she said type of stuff. Gosh hopefully I can stay healthy for like a few more days.

Blaze of Glory

Ok so today, I kept telling myself that I was gonna have a good day. I wanted to avoid the case of the Mondays. I had everything planned out, go to class, do some yardwork, work out, and work on CBC and 5:14 stuff. However, it didn't go that way, instead just chilling in IST, I leaned my chair to the right to see what Nichole was doing on her webpage, and then pop lock. My knee locked itself up yet again for the 3rd time in 3 months now. I just put my head down and kept asking God why, why can't I stay healthy for at least one month. I made an attempt to drive home, and as I did, it just felt like my plans for today went down the drain. How do I stay positive and continue to remain faithful to God?

So I got home to grab my crutches, only to go back to school to take another BIO quiz where I knew nothing about the subject matter. I went home, to only continue to eat pain killers, and ice my knee. I played some video games, and then laid on the couch to keep wondering why, why now? Then things started to happen....

I get calls from people about the CBC tournament, God knows we are praying for teams and it started happening. Yet I was upset because in my condition, even I began to wonder if I could heal that fast to be able to play. However, I was happy teams were calling because this is all for God's glory.

I played some more video games, only hoping that I can heal fast enough to play. Then my mom called me, and asked if I wanted to go looking for my baby for a better deal. So I decided to go, and as I got off the couch, I was able to limp around the house, semi-painful but no crutches. So I go to Noonan, to check out what deals they had to offer, an hour later, I am now the new owner of the 2004 Grand Prix GTP. However, I'm kind of down that yet I still have to trade in my old car next week in order to acquire my new one. So now I'm thinking ok, bummed knee, we have some teams interested in the tourny, and now I have signed and sealed a new car for myself, this day might not be so bad after all.

I get home, to watch Game 7, and congrats to the Devils. My cousin, Derrick comes over to play DW4 and we watched some Raw together. I limped him out of the house, and then without even thinking, I straighten out my leg and I am all of a sudden able to walk normally. Now I'm thinking, wow can I heal fast or what? The first time took 4 days to heal, 2nd time took 6 days, and now the 3rd time only 12 hours to heal. Now I can only hope that I don't reinjure it before this week's tournament.

Now while I'm able to walk, I sign online and I got a chance to talk to someone, who I'm very happy for to see where she is in her life. Hmmm, she wants to be known as Frodo, hahaha, but yeah we talked for an amazing 2 hours. I keep wondering if we've talked that long when we first knew each other. Anyways, the things Frodo was saying, was just a big encouragement to me. I just want Frodo to know that I will continue to pray for her, because God has answered my prayers so far.

So now my day looks like this, healed knee, a 5th team for CBC tournament, a new car, and a great talk/fellowship with Frodo the X-Man. God works in mysterious ways, I tell ya.

Leave A Light On

Today as I was driving down to worship, I was thinking a lot about what Conehead said. I was really upset with myself this morning for arriving tardy to worship for the 2nd straight week. I was supposed to be at CBC early this morning yet I overslept. Could it be the lack of sleep I get finally caught up? We are called to be serving God with a joyful heart. Yet lately I feel like it's more of an obligation to due certain ministries. Like finally I can say, preparing to teach Jr. Church now has been too time consuming. Today, I felt like all I did was waste their time because I didn't prepare anything today. Then their is the upcoming CBC Tournament, despite being in charge of the tract table, I feel like I haven't done much. I know maybe I haven't prayed hard or consistenly enough for this ministry. I think I may have over estimated how much we really need God's power to get this thing going. Today, was probably the first time that I said, that I can't wait till my term is up for Jr. Church, the CBC tournament is over, along with the CBC Retreat. It's been already hard enough trying to organize the CCUC preparations as well. All I can ask for is restoration right now so that I can serve Him with a joyful heart once again, and not be burnt out by serving.

I look forward to this week, because I feel like I have some time for myself. Kind of selfish for me to say as well. It was nice to just sit back and relax to see 2 Fast 2 Furious. I gotta say that I love this movie as much as I like the first one. It made me think about how I can't wait to purchase my new baby, make some modifications to it, redo my garage, and race it around to see what it can do. What I've been doing this past week was trying to look for an open field or a big enough parking lot where I can test my car. Also this movie brought back some memories of some of the greatest races I've had:

Grand Prix GT vs. Red Chevy Truck - This was going down on M-53 freeway, where he kept swerving both lanes so that I couldn't pass him. So I did the unthinkable, I lead him to the left side of the lane, then quickly cut all the way over to the right and driving on the shoulder just to pass him. Why the shoulder? Well he saw my move and tried to force me into the walls.

The Great CCUC Race of 2001 - This race included 4 other cars as we left Chinatown on Saturday night. If you had a helicopter view, all you could see was 4 cars going a 100 mph plus, zig zagging through their ways on I-290 and I-294. It was wierd because I didn't want to race these chumps, but everyone in the car encouraged me to do so.

92' Tempo vs. Cherokee - Yup you heard it right, a Tempo, but boy did I push that car a lot harder to the point where I could get the needle stuck all the way down on the speedometer. This was on a rainy day along I-69 and this Cherokee comes along for a challenge. My sister was in the car with me, and as he passed me, he cut right in front of us, and then slammed his brakes. I lost control of the car and was about to spin out onto the shoulder. However, I regained control and sped up to catch that sucka. My sis got scared, but once I passed him, I gave him the stare down and he gave me a thumbs up for the sign of respect in getting out of that situation.

Grand Prix GT, and Durango vs. Spyder, and Corvette - This race going up on M-53 started off me vs. the Spyder, and Corvette. My sis was driving her car and then decides to jump in this 3 way rumble. I had no idea what she was doing, so since I felt their were too many cars to race without my sis getting into trouble, I did something which I don't usually do. I tried to force the Corvette, and Spyder to exit on to 23 mile to finish this off so that my sis can continue driving M-53 by herself. However, only the Spyder followed me and the Corvette continued on M-53 to race with my sister. It just bugged me when my sis tries to do this type of stuff because she doesn't know what to do. Plus she can easily wipe herself out of a race with that tank.

Winter Storm 2001 - Boy this was a dumb one, I was racing against a station wagon in blizzard like conditions. I saw a move I wanted to make as I was trailing him for most of the way. Then bam it happened, I lost complete control, and did a couple of spins, flew off the ground a little along I-696, and slammed into the median. During this time, it was a complete humbling experience for me, as it was stupid of me to try to pull that move thinking it would of worked out the same way on a summer day. The tough part was going to court, but God is just and forgiving because my fine was lowered by a lot.

Toronto 2000 - This was just a melee along 401 as I was driving the Durango with the family inside the car. My dad was completely asleep, my sister thought it was the coolest thing, and my mom woke up because she could hear how loud I was pushing the Durango to go pass the 100 mph marker.

Orlando - Miami 2000 - Just like how 2 Fast 2 Furious portrayed the freeways of Florida, it is very accurate. What I love about Florida was that their were no potholes nor as much construction to slow me down. I remember, that my dad and sis were asleep as usual. My mom, woke up as she heard me push our rent a car (LeSabre) to the limits and beyond. My dad gave me what he thought was a time table of when we should get to Key West by. So I looked at it as a time race, the goal/objective was to get to Key West asap. My mom kept yelling at me as I was pushing past 100 mph along I-95 just so I can beat the time limit.

ACA Race of 2002 - This actually ranks up there for the stupidest race I've had. Elaine and I drove separately from WCCC, and we raced alone I-94 going past 100 mph to see who can get to the ACA building first. What was dumb was going at that speed, while we both had children in our cars. Now I'm confident in my driving abilities, but what if something did happen and some of our day camp kids got hurt or worst. Their would be a major law suit on ACA, myself, and Elaine. I learned my lesson from last year to be sure not to race in the same situation.

Their are plenty more, but due to time limits I'll leave off with that. Anyone wanna race along I-696 for fun?

Uh Huh

Well I would of blogged last night but due to the fact that Rich and I were up to 5 a.m. today playing Dynasty Warriors 4, I wasn't up to it. So an interesting thing happened to me on Thursday on my way to class. I'm on Tienken at the intersection of Rochester Rd. This lady, pulls right next to me and she didn't turn because that lane is for turning on to Rochester Rd. or turning into the gas station. So once the light was green, I drove off in my jolly way, then she cuts me off. I was like uhhh what the G just happened here. So then I figured well if she wants to play or race with me then all she could of done was just ask. So I decided to go on my jolly way by tailgating her to death. Eventually she got annoyed and slammed on the brakes, boy people are like dumb because I predicted her every move. As she slammed the brakes on, she gave me the "your number 1 sign" and my reaction of course was, I just simply waved hi to her and smiled. Once we were on Adams, I past her and again she believes that I am number 1. I realized that she was some fat mama, so when she looked at me, and gave me another encouraging sign, I smiled again and blew her a kiss. After that she decided to slow down because she wanted no part of this. However, at the next red light, I just stared her down since she was next to me. Yeah, I tell ya, people challenge or start something on the road but then don't finish or back it up. Sheesh, and oh kids don't try this on the road ;)

Now this next entry is to all of you who want to be a homeowner or think that it is easy. All I want to do at home is just live in peace, ya know to all my neighbors, don't bother me and I won't bother you. Last year, the complaint in the sub about me, was that I didn't mow my lawn enough. So this year, now that I do mow it, to make all them mothercanuckers that live on my street happy. I find yet another complaint yesterday. After I had finished mowing the lawn, my next door neighbor, Al comes over as I just gotten out of the shower to talk about his complaint. His complaint is that I leave too much mowed grass on my property and then the wind blows it to his.

So now I am thinking ok, last year y'all didn't like me because I rarely cut the grass. Now this year, I do a better job of it, however, I don't cleanup as good as everyone else. Al begins to talk to me about how he is frustrated about it, and then he dissed my landscaping by mentioning how everyone has nice lawns. Then Al made a bad mistake, he revealed too much about himself, by letting me know that he is the President of the Homeowner's Association. So I'm thinking ok Mr. Perfect Lawn, I took Al to my basement window, and played my trump card. I showed him how my window is cracked, yeah I wonder how it got that way? Yup, that pretty much shut Al up because dang it, he may have the perfect lawn, but his kids ain't coming clean on this one.

So now I'm thinking man how do I be the light in this situation. So I bit my tongue, and asked Al if their was anything I could do to clean up. So I spent which was like my life, doing 3 hours of lawn care just for good ol' Al. I learned a few things while doing this. I learned how fricking this neighborhood is because dude they got tabs on when I am in and out of the house. So I guess I gotta do a little homework on my neighbors. Al also told me whoelse is on the Homeowner's Association in my neighborhood. I also learned that I too can join their little pow wow meetings. This is important to me because now I will know just which other son of a guns in my neighborhood that have been complaining.

I look forward to joining the meetings, but why go to meetings where people don't like my lawn. Well, ya know the saying "Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer" that applies here. Gosh everyone in this whole neighborhood only cares about how their lawns has to be so perfect. One of these days I tell ya, I'm gonna host some sort of carnival because it's my lawn. Al talked about how I can't put fenses up, well whoever said about putting about booby traps in the backyard. Boy I'm gonna have fun playing war games on my own street.

These Arms

Just got done watching The Italian Job, and I gotta say if it wasn't for Seth Green this movie wouldn't of been as good as I thought it would be. I just wished it had some more action, but I liked the plot of the movie. This movie brought back some memories of my stealing days. During my jr. high and high school years, I had a prob with stealing. At Davis, I was a pretty good pick pocket, just lifting guy's wallets with them not realizing it. With the girl's, I was usually pretty good searching through their purses when they still had it strapped to their shoulder. Other than my parents, I would have to say that I stole from everyone else in my family at least once. I love checking out how good security is at some places, to see how I would get around things. I stole from everybody, family, friends, and strangers. Do I do this anymore? Nah, but sometimes I gotta admit, the temptation is there from time to time.

Today, I noticed that I was completely drained. My whole right arm just feels like it wants to drop like a ton of bricks. My lower back is killing me, and my knee is sore as well. I looked outside at my lawn and realize how high the grass is now. I look at the inside of my house and realize how messy it is. I just wish I have some down time for myself now to kind of relax and do some house cleaning. I know I haven't relaxed in a while but I gotta remember that even Jesus needed a break as well. I even had a 2 hour nap today and still it was not good enough for my body.

I've been pretty excited this week that I am getting closer to getting my new car. But yet now I feel like I am being so materialistic. Like I'm saving up right now so that I can add a car alarm to it, radar detector, tinted windows, ground effects, and any other modifications I can do to it. Man stupid 4 door though! However, I'm also a sentimental guy, like I'm really gonna miss my old car. This was my first car that I've had from the first day all brand new. We've been through so many things together, trips to Chicago, NY, Cedar Point, Toronto, etc. The countless nights just driving around then pulling off and laying down with the moonroof open to look at the stars and talk to God. The multiple pull overs I've had with the cops. Or how bout the multiple street races I've had and still having. I'm looking forward to finally getting power on my garage doors. Again it's very materialistic of me to say this, but I wish and still hope that I can keep my old car while getting the new one. I keep imagining of just how nice my garage would look with both those cars in there, then I can turn my garage into a real garage where I can modify cars and just take care of them. I gives praises to God for blessing me with a new automobile soon, but yet at the same time I ask for forgiveness because of my materialistic mindset at this point.

The Final Countdown

I learned a few more things today about myself. I wish I had a chance to re-do my highlight video because tonight was the first time I saw it along with everyone. I realized some of the errors I made on it, like I know for a fact I must of hit record to late because I missed Thumbs serving an ace. From what I saw on the video I missed a couple more as well. I hope I can do a better job with this year's CCUC tournament.

I learned today that I am suffering from a low potassium intake as well. I guess it kind of helps that I have not ate a real meal for the past 72 hours but 1 all out meal. This low potassium level is what is causing my calf muscles to cramp up. So my cure for it right now is that I am destroying this piece of porterhouse from Chili's to get it back. What other foods though will get my potassium level back up?

I will learn more tonight about BIO as I pull an all nighter to study for yet another fun exam.

I learned that Spring Arbor University got a few more buildings which was cool to check them out.

I learned that Shubs is a pretty good darn cook herself. I also learned some interesting things about The Bible today as Tim and I were looking it over together during dinner. I'm gonna miss him when he goes off to A2 next year. Ever since I came to CBC, I always admired his knowledge of God's Word. Tonight was just another example of it, as we kept going back and forth trying to see what we can get out of God's Word through Paul's letters.

I learned that man people actually like that fusion orange color on my car.

I learned that at this year's CCUC tournament, that I will be playing b-ball for sure now.

I learned that once I start Day Camp work again, I may decide not to eat lunch with the rest of the 5:14 crew that are down there. I realized that I will be working with a whole new staff this year and will have to teach them the ropes. Plus I just love my kids, and I like to eat lunch with them so I can get to know them better.

Finally, I learned or actually reminded about how I may not be good enough for some people. It's that I am created in God's image and that is all that matters because I am good enough for God.

Ok, one more, I learned that this piece of steak I just ate did not fill me up. However, if I eat more, I'll probably end up with a food coma and not study for my finals.

Ok ok, last one, I learned how addicted I've been to online euchre now. The other day I kept playing and was on a 4 game losing streak, and I just kept playing till I ended it and brought my rating above 1500 again.

I learned that I am done for this entry.

How Will I Know

You are Neo, from "The Matrix." You
display a perfect fusion of heroism and
compassion.


What Matrix Persona Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Wow, Neo eh? I wonder if all of you agree to what it says?

Conclusions manifest, your first impressions got to be your very best
I see your full of shit, and that's alright
That's how you play, and I guess you'll get through every night
Well now that's over
I see your fantasy, you want to make it a reality paved in gold
See inside,
Inside of your heads
Well now that's over
I see your motives inside, decisions to hide
Backoff I'll take you on
Headstrong to take on anyone

Today was just a true blessing to me, I felt God magnificent power in so many different ways today. I had to go see the specialist today and he was very impressed again as to how fast I have healed since I re-injured it. When I hurt it the first time, God knew that I was very scared of surgery was the only way to go. So I hurt it the 2nd time thinking ok their is definitely gonna be some sort of arthoscopic surgery done. But I feel better than ever and now I know why. The doc told me that when I hurt it the first time, I had a huge tear in the lateral meniscus, however the second time, it must of meant that I tore off what was hanging inside of my knee. Which the doc said, I pretty much did my own surgery, which was very good because he said he was gonna cut me open to cut out that tear. It's amazing how God used my second injury to actually heal my knee. Their is still the possibility of a surgery if I hurt it the 3rd time which I am hoping not to. It's all about having faith baby.

Later in the day, I just totally praised God for the wonderful friendship that He has blessed me with through B.S. (no it is not that, and sorry but it was the only way I could refer you as). It's just amazing how God uses people in mysterious ways. God used this person, to help me get rid of my distractions. I heard a lot of things and it hurt me because you think you know people but you really don't. Why is that? It's all about integrity, I never realized how people think they can turn it off like a light switch. I remember one person told me that I should be more trusting to them, uh yeah I got 3 letters to that, DTA. I just can't get over the fact of how people put themselves in tempting situations. One of the things that is the most important to me, are the children that I have been in contact with whether it is through ACA, CBC, VBS, or even my own family. Do I practice what I teach to them? As a leader and a teacher, I am held to a higher standard, and if I don't own up to what I say then I should be ashamed of myself. I would never want to be like that of what is described in 2 Peter 2:1-4, but their are those who are out there. However, I must continue to be like Nehemiah or my heart would be just as cold, and inconsiderate. After a nice fellowship time, I feel stronger mentally, spiritually, and physically. My song for this month has been decided already for the CBC tournament, Headstrong by Trapt. This song is also the theme song for WWE's pay per view this month, Bad Blood, what a coincidence. No more distractions, I now know who are real and those like in the Bible, Matt. 10:16 a wolf dressed among sheeps clothes (depending which version you read).

Only In Dreams

You are Neo, from "The Matrix." You
display a perfect fusion of heroism and
compassion.


What Matrix Persona Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Well it is now how you say 2:30 a.m. and only a few hours away till IST time. I seriously do not know what chapter we are in the book. I come in, sit down in front of my computer, set up yahoo euchre and AIM, then play and chat for about 3 hours of class time. I actually do participate during class discussions, but only to make it seem like I am aware of what we are discussing about.

Some of us helped V moved the other day and it got me thinking about house management. I know I had a few conversations with people about this. Yes, owning a house is a good long term investment and hey you can call it your place. However, I think a lot of people overlook how much work you actually have to put into it. Like last year, at first, I did so rarely mow the lawn and neighbors complained. This year, I'm a little more aware of it, and even now that I'm getting some type of automatic garage door installed that is killing me too. It sucks to just sit around at home waiting for people to come over to install it. Or even cleaning up my own mess (which there is plenty of), I think a lot of us wish it would just take care of itself.

For the last 48 hours, what has been on my mind now has been b-ball. I was excited as I have now recieved the letter for CBC to regulate at this year's CCUC tournament. On Saturday, I got a chance to make out it out to Cougie's game, congrats to their team on advancing. However, I noticed who else was in this league, and that was J.R. and Romeo, our tournament nemesis at MSU over the past few years now. I wish I could just play in this league now just to get another crack at them after our early bow out at this year's tournament. A couple of weeks ago, I gave my commitment to a friend in playing in a b-ball tournament with him during July 4th weekend. My parents were talking to me these past couple of days about doing the unthinkable road trip to Minnesota. Again I would love to go back because I miss my family out there. This time my parents goal was to get to Minneapolis, going through the U.P. of Michigan and I look forward to that just because I would like to see what is up there and admire God's creation. Plus I looked forward to spending some family time with my folks since this summer is non stop school and Day Camp with no breaks nor vacation. However, I have pretty much made up my mind now that I will be true to my word and play in this tournament because I want another chance to play against J.R. and Romeo.

Then came today, after Tuesday night v-ball, I was really set on resting my knee till Monday. In only less than 10 hours, I get to go and see the specialist at Beaumont, and he'll probably run some tests on me to discuss if I will have to look at surgery. But it was hard to stay away from the temptation, seeing some of the CBC boyz battle against the Mandarin crew, was hard to get away from it. So of course, I gotta play, and I don't another step which was a big risk, I played without my new knee brace. I have learned just how much this thing immobilizes me and it is annoying. It felt wierd playing for the first time in a couple of weeks and I gotta admit I was a bit timid at times, trying to see where my timing was exactly. It was frustrating to know that I didn't feel like I played to where I wanted to play at. It's another thing when people tell you that though, which is fine now because to me then now that I look at it, is that obviously I wasn't playing good enough for them either. So this will only fuel my desire at the Rec Center after Beaumont as I feel it is time to hit the weight room harder than ever.

Do you believe?
No more doubters,
No more hating,
It's time to,
Put up
Or shut up
No fear
No Surrender
Only the strong survive
Have faith
And keep it

No One Else